Tuesday March 5th of the year 2024 will go down as the day of the Great Facebook Outage. 100’s of millions of people have gone without Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, and Threads for hours and the world does not know what to do with its idle time. Conspiracy theories abound as to what caused the outage. Fortunately for us, KVTA4.com has a social media expert on payroll.
Dr. Gong has it on good authority from multiple credible sources that Tom from Myspace and Craig from Craigslist are behind this outage. Turns out the two have been conspiring together for some time on ways to get back at the Zucc. Tom’s grudge goes back years ago when Facebook ultimately overtook Myspace in popularity and pretty much drove it into the ground.
Craig’s beef is more recent. Facebook launched their “Marketplace” not that many years ago, which made Craigslist obsolete in a matter of months, save for scammers. The two have quietly been trying to launch their own social media platform months, but with the mega powers that Zucc holds, the project has been arduous at best.
“Tom and Craig are not the, ‘if we can’t beat them, join them’ type”, according to Dr. Gong. “They are more about revenge if anything”. And the best way to ruin Zucc’s day is to bring his sites down. In a combined effort the two men employed dozens of hackers to act on their behalf. Over the course of 12hrs this legion of hackers brought down Big Blue to joy of Tom and Craig.
Tom and Craig are reportedly besides themselves with laughter about this outage. The two men know this is a temporary shutdown as the powers of Facebook will surely prevail in the end, but what a coup for them on this day.
So, from now on let us remember this victory, because the little guy won a battle today. The war is a forgone conclusion, but today we celebrate Tom and Craig.
Leave a Reply