“I Wasn’t Doing No Prostituting! I Was Feeding Him With My Vagina….” -Says Woman Arrested For Prostitution.


Ojai, CA- Local known prostitute Kandy Kenoff (31), was taken in again by Ventura County Sheriff’s Deputies. This was Kandy’s 23rd arrest for prostitution. She claims that she was in fact doing “No prostituting”, but was “Feeding” her John with her “Vagina”.

The town of Ojai, where the crime took place, is very progressive. Dozens of women can be seen openly feeding hungry mouths with their armpit hairs swaying in the wind while their electric cars charge. Therefore it was not out of the question that Kandy was indeed doing the same, only problem is, how do you feed someone with your vagina?

“You see, his penis was feeding on me deputy. Totally natural to feed someone right? Well he was being nourished!”, Kandy was heard saying as she was being placed in the back of a Sheriff’s cruiser. Kandy was observed riding her John in the back of his Toyota Camry. When police arrived they witnessed illegal sex acts, “Definitely no feeding going on in the back of that car. Good old prostitution plain and simple. Our department has a long history with Kandy and she is always ready with a good excuse”, deputy Clingman told our reporters.

Kandy Kenoff is facing up to 5 years in prison for her 23rd prostitution arrest.


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